Raise Your Hand if You’re Surprised

Raise your hand if you’re surprised by this post. No? No one?

That’s right, ladies and gentleman, put your hands together for…another Buffy themed post!

So, first I’d like to say a little something about the Buffy reboot. I’m against it. Again, I know you’re not surprised.  Well, Joss Whedon’s not particularly pleased about it, either.

Want to hear what the man himself had to say about all these shenanigans? Well, aren’t you lucky? It just so happens to be right below you. Look down! Now back up! (Sorry, I couldn’t help it. I love me some Isaiah Mustafa.)

Kristin [Dos Santos of E!Online], I’m glad you asked for my thoughts on the announcement of Buffy the cinema film. This is a sad, sad reflection on our times, when people must feed off the carcasses of beloved stories from their youths—just because they can’t think of an original idea of their own, like I did with my Avengers idea that I made up myself.

Obviously I have strong, mixed emotions about something like this. My first reaction upon hearing who was writing it was, “Whit Stillman AND Wes Anderson? This is gonna be the most sardonically adorable movie EVER.” Apparently I was misinformed. Then I thought, “I’ll make a mint! This is worth more than all my Toy Story residuals combined!” Apparently I am seldom informed of anything. And possibly a little slow. But seriously, are vampires even popular any more?

I always hoped that Buffy would live on even after my death. But, you know, AFTER. I don’t love the idea of my creation in other hands, but I’m also well aware that many more hands than mine went into making that show what it was. And there is no legal grounds for doing anything other than sighing audibly. I can’t wish people who are passionate about my little myth ill. I can, however, take this time to announce that I’m making a Batman movie. Because there’s a franchise that truly needs updating. So look for The Dark Knight Rises Way Earlier Than That Other One And Also More Cheaply And In Toronto, rebooting into a theater near you.

Leave me to my pain! Sincerely, Joss Whedon. (From ComicBookMovie.com)

*Shuffling papers.* In other news, the SyFy network still seems to be unaware that there is NO SOUND in space. Don’t believe me, SyFy? Read this. Ah! Science!

Now, I know that the television shows on SyFy are not the first–nor will they be the last–to portray sound in a vacuum, but I’ve been watching a lot of Stargate Universe lately (guilty pleasure–don’t judge!) and the amount of NOISE in their vacuum is really mind boggling. Today there are explosions, yesterday there were shuttle propulsion systems, and the list goes on and on and on. It’s kind of like that Taio Cruz song. Anybody? No? Moving on.

I just want to see a little bit of science–a smidgen, perhaps, or a pinch; maybe a dash–in my science fiction. To quote myself from earlier today (yes, I’ve stooped to that), “Dear SyFy channel, One cannot hear explosions in SPACE. Change your name, you’re a disgrace to science fiction.”


Sarah Jane

P.S.: If you need me, I’ll be in the TARDIS. Nerd jokes nerd jokes nerd jokes!

  1. you may be a giant nerd, but you are also truly awesome. Just sayin.

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